You guys, I have been spending a lot of money lately. Not just on wedding and honeymoon stuff, either.
Some of it is justifiable – I’m trying to build a warddrobe for an entirely new climate. I only needed one pair of shorts in CA because it only rarely got hot enough for that, but when it’s 95 degrees out, I changed into shorts every day. Now I’m trying to get ready for fall and winter, and I just don’t have anything that warm.
Another factor is probably just that I haven’t been tracking finances all that well. We had a big influx of cash from wedding gifts, so that makes me feel flush with money. I still haven’t been reimbursed for all of our travel and temporary living, so I expect my savings rate to be low.
However, the shopping doesn’t seem to show any signs of slowing, and not everything has been practical or needed. I think I might know why.
My old boss – the one from California – died about a month ago. And while it hasn’t impacted me much since I don’t work there anymore, it’s still upsetting. She died without any family, and some of her work friends were the only people there with her in the hospital when she passed.
She and I had talked about finances sometimes, and she even arranged for her financial advisor to come and give a talk about finances to a group of the 20-somethings that worked for her. We checked the company out later – they say they prefer to work with people who have net worths over $1M.
But she wore ratty clothes that didn’t fit. She complained a lot about work, and was only enthusiastic about the one vacation she took every year: a weeklong trip to Hawaii. I don’t think her simple life made her unhappy, but 30 years at a job you don’t love isn’t exactly the American dream.
She was only 56 and she had millions in the bank and then she died and barely enjoyed any of it.
So I think maybe that’s why, for the first time in a long time, I’m having trouble worrying about saving. And I know this probably sounds like I’m being a bitch and blaming my overspending on some poor dead woman, but I don’t want miss out on things now just so I can die with a million dollars in the bank.